Sorry I haven't updated in a while.





So I keep hearing that I need to update more often, and they're right. I'm hoping to spend a little time every day writing in this blog. It might only be a short entry -- a quote or a song -- but it'll be an entry at least. Things at the moment are... haywire. I have to move again, for financial reasons that I'd rather not get into too deeply, and I'm moving into crisis housing.

Long story short, I thought I'd be able to afford this place but because of reasons that I wasn't aware of at the time, that won't be possible. It was going to be a tight fit to begin with but something happened that further decreased my funds and... I just can't afford to live here anymore.

It's a real tragedy because I love it here. I love the people I live with, I love the dog, I love the neighbour's dog, but I have to make the call. I can live under the red line or I can cut my losses and start over. I've only been here three weeks so it's not such a big loss but it still hurts.

The way I see it, I'm climbing a mountain. The path isn't going to be straightforward all of the time; it's going to curve up to the summit, and the only way to reach it is to take the meandering path. They say that the path to salvation is narrow and winding and as much as I don't hold that sentiment anymore, I appreciate the metaphor. The way to happiness and fulfillment is rarely a straight line.

But things are always getting better, but only so long as I'm trying to make them better. I sat in a room for a year, with all of the material possessions that I thought would make me happy and none of it did. My xbox, my 52" television, my espresso machine... and in the end, I realised I was alone with my things.

The worst part was that the only person I interacted with -- myself -- wasn't even somebody I particularly liked. I'd look in the mirror and hate the person staring back at me, not because I hated him but because I hated being him.

I keep trying to think up a fancy way to end this post. I don't have one.

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